The Almost Hobbit
by Madeleine Van Helsing
Summary: Evangeline Took has dreamed of adventures all her life. When finally five merchants come to The Shire, she is on her knees, begging to go with them in search of a lost hoard of gold. This story tells of friendship, family, love and money as the six go through Middle Earth to find Amon Rudh (Rudh - Ruth) and the treasures hidden in the lair of Mim the dwarf. Rated KP to be safe.
1. Introduction

The Almost Hobbit Introduction

_**AN:**_** If you want another chapter, please tell me. I'd like to know if I'm making people happy.**

**DISCLAIMER: All places, historical figures and battles mentioned are the work of J. R. R. Tolkien. More info to be found in 'The Silmarilion'.**

_When is a legend, legend? Why is a myth, a myth? How old and _

_d__isused __must__ a fact be __for it to be __relagated to the category 'fairy-tale'?_

_And why do certain facts remain incontrovertable, while __others _

_lose their validity to __asume a shabby, unstable character?_

_**- Anne McCaffrey, Dragonflight**_

In a time before us Big People can recall, in a time when goblins, orks and elves roamed free on the face of this Earth, there lived a peaceful people. Unlike dwarves, who sought gold or revenge on those who had taken it. Unlike wizards, who learnt their trades and made no good difference with them. These people, though smaller than those dwarves, were kinder than those wizards. These people were never late for breakfast, luncheon, dinner, supper, or anything in-between. These people were colourful and good, polite and happy. More than that;

They were hobbits.

You have, of course, heard all about our dear hero mister Bilbo Baggins of Bagend. Or perhaps of his nephew, the courageous Frodo. You have so need no description of how these hobbits looked or acted. And if you know of the adventurous Tooks and Baggins', you should know also, of Bilbo's niece.

A Took, no less, and a daring one. Evangeline Took, of whom I speak now, was very much like her kin to begin with. Her skin was dark, as was common among hobbits, and her hair was curly, as was also common. I need not tell of her feet, as you will know all that is important already. All I shall say is that they were abnormally large, but abnormally stealthy. She was fair of face with a pare of deep-set, dark eyes. Her hair was so curly, it was frizzy, and a blazing red, like that of the snow-covered mountains at sunset. Part sun, part moon, part darkness, set the sky and hills alight making a colour that held such a likeness to Evangeline's hair, some said she was born atop one of those snow-peeks.

Her father, heaven forbid, was unknown. _A nobody_, said her mother when returned from adventuring with a wailing babe. No one knew his name, so Eva (as her friends called her) was a Took, and glad to be. Her mother died when she was young, and most said it was the adventures and the child that had driven her to such illness. Eva contradicted this with "_it couldn't have been. She loved both dearly, and I have always been _(as her uncle Bilbo so often said under his breath)_ as good as a golden ring."_ She had no idea why her uncle had muttered so much about rings. Cousin Frodo knew, of course, but would reveal not one clue. He, like their uncle and so many of their ancestors before them, had been on adventures and knew the truth. He told them, obviously, the most exciting parts, but none of the interesting things like why he'd gone in the first place, and what had happened in between the fighting and exploring.

From a very young age, Eva had been encouraged, discouraged, prepared and forbidden from going on adventures of her own, and always, she had wanted some. She would starve herself for weeks in preparation for lack of provisions, and slept outside without so much as a fire for the nights she'd have to spend camping. She could fight well with many weapons, and could just about improvise with ones she'd never held. But every hero needs a weakness, and Evangeline Took's was her nature. She was kind at heart with a shockingly stubborn and sensitive mercy. She trusted easily, though only those she deemed worthy of it. She was no killer, no heartbreaker. She was a gentle soul, the love of most of The Shire. Nobody dared hurt her. Unfortunately, she used this to advantage, and when playing battle with the other young boys and girls, she would almost undoubtedly emerge victorious.

"But enough of Eva's reputation and past. _This_ story begins in the years after Frodo's adventures, when Bilbo's winnings were still plentiful for the dwarves, and when Eva was a young girl at just thirty two. Let us start on a Wednesday in the early months of spring. Eva was, as was often rumoured, sitting in the trees beside Bagend, talking to the birds who were returning from the warmer lands to which they had fled for the winter. Mrs Coppertop, Eva's guardian, was hanging out the washing, Sam Coppertop, Mrs Coppertop's little boy, was out fishing with a friend or two, and a party of five merchants were keeping company with Mr Coppertop inside. This is what Eva overheard with the sparrow through the open window.


	2. Chapter One

The Almost Hobbit Chapter One

_**AN:**** i loved writing this and I really hope you love reading it. I'm writing chapter six at the moment, if anyone would like to give me some ideas?**_

"I am very sorry sir. But I have no wish to go on an _adventure_. Nasty, messy things. No food or pillows. Best avoid them at all costs. I am so very sorry. _I_ will not go." The person who spoke was of course Mr Coppertop, who enjoyed a quiet life house-sitting at Bagend for the last Baggins'. He thought, as soon as he was asked on an adventure, of his dear ward and daughter-figure Evangeline, but was reluctant to see the back of her for fear of her never returning.

"It will be dangerous, I'll grant you," said the human who lead the merchants, Jehosaphat.

"But this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance." Jehosaphat smiled kindly as he spoke, but his eyes spoke of evil and devastation.

"There _will_ be fights, blood spilt, lives lost. There _will_ be sleeping in caves, and we _will_ be left with nothing, somehow or other. I can guarantee you will be a different man when you return."

"_If_ I come back. And can you promise that change will be for the better?"

"You can never quite say, but that's half the fun of it." But Mr Coppertop would have none of it. Eva wanted badly to go, and Mr Coppertop knew she would, but he could not, simply _would_ not see his darling daughter, only daughter, the daughter he'd never had, turn away from him and most likely never turn back again.

At least she might be happy again. She had not been _properly_ happy since her mother died almost two decades ago. He stood and walked to the window, puffing smoke out his nose and chewing on his long, long pipe.

"Could you at least point us in the direction of someone who _would_ be willing to join us?" asked Finrod, an elf who had mastered the arts of wikka and medicine earning him the title 'Witch-doctor'.

'_Nobody this side of Bree'_ thought Mr Coppertop, but said nothing immediately. He just leant out of the window and looked up at the sky.

"Evangeline, get down from there," he gasped when he saw her watching him. He knew she'd heard. He knew he had already lost her.

"Please may _I_ go, Mr Coppertop? _Please_ may I?"

"She can't," said Jehosaphat with a sigh, a laugh and a grunt all at once making him sound ill and somewhat maddened. His four companions sniggered at him, but he continued to look at Mr Coppertop. He didn't once turn to the girl in the tree.

"She can't come sir, for she is a maiden. Maidens are not suited well to adventures."

"This one is," argued Eva, leaping down from the tree and gliding in through the window with one swift hop. Jehosaphat still would not look at her. She simply scowled.  
"My mother, cousin _and_ uncle have all gone on adventures," she told them all.

"I have been brought up accordingly. I _must_ go on one or two… or more."

"Not with us," Jehosaphat informed not Eva, but Mr Coppertop.

"Of course with you," she cried.

"Who else?" But Jehosaphat would not take her.

"I can fight," she told them, becoming desperate.

"I can survive in the wild." With that, she began naming all the reasons they should take her. When she was done, Finrod the elf spoke out again.

"The fact remains that you are a _woman_, my dear. And I have never seen, after sixty years, Jehosaphat take a woman on an adventure. This one will have goblins. And dragons. There is no place for a lady."

"I am just the same as any man. My look and manner may be softer, and I may not be a killer. But take me with you, and I'll prove better than even… _Jehosaphat_ in battle." Now, this last remark was the one to get the merchants intrigued. Jehosaphat would not fight a girl, so with a sword in hand, she faced Nero, a dwarf. Dwarves are, as you know, a fearless and battle-trained race who would take on any other at a pinch. Even a rather dainty looking hobbit-maiden.

He flung aside his hooded orange cape and drew a two-handled blade with spikes all down each side. They went to the path outside so as not to upset the living room. Once there, Eva tightened her shoal so it wouldn't fall off and bending down, ripped off the hem of her already torn dress so her feet had some space to move in. She smiled in a child-like goodness, and holding the sword in an unthreatening manner, she gave Nero reason enough to hesitate. But not for long. He charged into battle with gusto, sure it would last less than a minute.

Twenty minutes later, they had gained numerous cuts and scratches. Block, slash, duck, dodge, they both had a look of wild pleasure as the excitement of the fight made them feel strong and free. Eva used her size to advantage, while Nero used his weight. It was a long time 'til Nero, panting and huffing, held Eva on the dusty ground with the sword inches from her throat. All thought it was over. But as Nero glanced for just a second to smile at his friends, he was thrown from his feet and upended on the path, unable to escape the small girl's clutches. Mr Coppertop cheered, sad that now they would _have_ to take her, Mrs Coppertop wailed over the torn, and now muddy and grass-stained dress and Finrod smiled, helping the fallen dwarf to his feet.

Eva had won more than just _Nero's_ respect in that fight.

"Let her come, Jo," he puffed, clinging onto Finrod as he was hauled to his feet.

"She's a better fighter than any of us, and no one would guess it." Jehosaphat sighed and bowed his head.

"A woman. On _my_ expedition. Very well, but she is _your_ charge, not mine." And to that they all agreed.

Eva packed anything she's need, and promised Mrs Coppertop she would try to come back after it all, and as the old woman wept, Mr Coppertop promised not to let anyone believe his just-about-a-daughter was dead. Slowly, they set off.

Grand horses awaited them, a different size for each rider.

Nero had a small horse, or perhaps a large pony. They had wanted a hobbit, so a smaller pony stood waiting. Finrod and Jehosaphat had proper horses, as did Hamnet, Jehosaphat's grown-up son. The last member was a young wizard by the name of Archer, who was still in magic-training and for some reason had a beautiful donkey called Penelope.

As they rounded the corner, trotting away into the grey-blue distance, Sam Coppertop came running up the hill.

"When will she be back? Where has she gone?" he panted, and all Mr Coppertop could do as he stood puffing on his pipe and getting misty eyes, was say;

"I have no idea."


	3. Chapter Two

**AN: _Next chapter coming soon! Hope y'all enjoying it._**

The road the party took was through woods, over hills, and under bridges. They did all these things on donkey, pony and horseback, _and_ in absolute silence. Finrod rode at the back, looking over his shoulder every few minutes. Jehosaphat rode at the front, not looking back once. Nero rode beside Eva while Hamnet and Archer watched from the sidelines with curiosity. After miles and miles and hours and hours, the sky was growing dark and from far away, they spied it.

From atop a hill, it looked nothing more than a dark patch between tree and road, lit from within and spilling out slurred, jolly music.

They went the quickest path and soon arrived before 'The King's Stay'.

"This place looks as distasteful as Jehosaphat's manner," remarked Eva.

"What is it?"

"A tavern." Everyone looked, startled to hear his voice, to the leader of the group. Jehosaphat slid from his horse's back and turned to see his friends and Eva.

"The girl knows not of taverns, men. Should we not send the wretched thing back to its hole?"

"I know what a tavern is," cried Eva.

"I just want to know about this one in particular." Jehosaphat led his horse to Finrod who had dismounted his, and now took both steeds.

"This is called 'The King's Stay', because long ago, a prince came by and stayed the night. He left without paying and we knew not who he was. However, when he died, money was brought by dwarf after dwarf to thank us for housing, feeding and somewhat impressing their late King under the Mountain, Thorin Oakenshield. Before that, it was named after the owner."

"You speak as if you work there," commented Eva.

"No," sighed Jehosaphat with such an air of sadness, it made Eva's scowl fade.

"I'm just a regular. I _was_, at least." Eva frowned slightly. '_Once on an adventure, one cannot visit one's favoured pubs_,' she supposed. But why he would be so melancholy about such a trivial thing eluded her.

They tied up their horses, ponies and Penelope, and Jehosaphat held the door open for everyone to pass through, meaning Eva had it slammed in her face. Archer reopened it for her.

Inside, it was more like a pigsty than an inn. '_Why was the king impressed?_' Men danced on tables, spoke with their mouths full and spat on each other. Several songs were being sung out of tune and most were about drinking. Barmaids rushed to and fro with trays and towels and drunken men and dwarves. There appeared to be no female customers left alone, and judging by some of the people's faces, they weren't very civil. She also noticed Archer staying particularly close and promised to thank him later.

As they waded through the sleeping, beaten, drunken and sobbing to an empty table, a shout came from the bar.

"Jo, me ol' pal! Come over 'ere an' get a round on the 'ouse for yer mates an' yer lady-friend, an' talk to me. I ain't seen yer in months."

"She's not my lady-friend," was the first thing he said.

"I don't even know her name." Obviously, it was followed closely with;

"She's with Nero and Finrod." Eva just smiled.

"And Archer and Hamnet," sniggered Nero, but Hamnet shook his head and stepped towards his father.

The barman sat them at a large table and brought them all drinks. Jehosaphat drank long and heartily, all the time asking for more ale. Nero did the same while Finrod and Eva, sitting side by side, had water. Archer and Hamnet, however, had a little (though not much) wine. The meal was stupendous with bread rolls and apples and cheese and pie. Nero and Jehosaphat threw it about and ate like animals, Hamnet attempting to join in. They sang drinking songs and all sorts with the rest of the tavern's customers, and Eva, after a while, had to escape the sounds, sights and smells. Archer followed her outside, of course, for who knew what would become of a young girl, all by herself, at a place like that. Nothing, it would seem, as all that happened was Archer showed off his newest spell in the barns, until Finrod came out to show them to the room.

They all stayed in a room together, but there were only five beds. One was a double, granted, but Jehosaphat got it and spread himself out like a starfish, wrapping the covers tight around him. There was no room left for anyone else.

"I'll sleep on the floor," said Eva to which Jehosaphat replied;

"Good. Right where it belongs." But Finrod and Archer were having none of it.

"You are a lady," Archer told her,

"And therefore, should always sleep in a bed, if one is at hand." In the end, Nero slept on the floor. He was already snoring, so they just rolled him off the bed he'd fallen on to.

Eva didn't sleep well, but she was comfortable.

She got up while everyone else was still in bed, besides Nero who, as we know, was still on the floor. Eva had to climb over him to get out because he was cuddled up against the leg of the bed. After she had prepared herself for another day's wanderings, she sat down in the corner with a scrap of paper and a splash of ink. Checking everyone else was asleep, she began to write.

'_Mr & Mrs Coppertop, Bagend, Underhill, Hobbiton, The Shire._

_To my dearest Mr and Mrs Coppertop, and Sam,_

_We have arrived and slept at a tavern called 'The King's Stay' that sells fine foods and too much alcohol. I have not the strength to make merry yet for fear of what might happen to me, so I am sober, thank goodness. My darling and beautiful pony is called Bouncer, and so lively I'd have sooner called her Sam if she weren't already named by dear Finrod. All are sleeping so I am writing to you as a last goodbye. Or perhaps not. I hope to write often, and whenever some truly unspeakable happening comes to light._

_I think Archer (he is the wizard) is a charming, sweet man who in all honesty needs a friend to turn to every now and then. I am yet unacquainted with the handsome Hamnet who seems good enough it weren't for his wretched father. Then of course Nero. He is a kind soul, as polite and selfless to me as ever he could be. And you all know Finrod, the elf, is nothing but gentleness and good-nature. He has not raised his hand or his voice to me once. None of them have._

_As of Jehosaphat, however, I feel he has a heart beneath all that icy armour for I saw it in his face yesterday evening. I shall get through to him I hope. Most men appreciate a woman's helping hand, and I am determined to be friends with them all._

_Finrod and Archer, my dear friends, are awake at last so I must stop writing and assist them in awakening Nero. His head will ache after his drinking yester night, but he shall be fine._

_Goodbye my loves and I shall see you again in the future._

_Yours truly,_

_Evangeline Took.'_

"You have done with your letter, Eva? Good. Let us waken the dwarf." It was Finrod who had spoken, and Eva replied with a nod of her head.

"Good morning, Archer," she smiled as she walked past him to Nero. He wished her the same and stood by Finrod as Eva knelt over her sleeping friend and carefully poured half the contents of her water skin onto his face. As he opened his eyes, she darted away with shocking speed for what she couldn't have supposed was a threatening scenario. However, she judged its danger correctly, for no sooner had Nero come to his senses, he began to flail and kick in self-defence. Then, with great difficulty, he clambered to his feet and opened his mouth to say hello.

Only no words were spoken.

First, his belly gurgled, then his eyes watered, and finally, a long, loud, stomach-churning, bubbly belch erupted from his open mouth.

"I did a little sick," he murmured as Jehosaphat and Hamnet climbed out of bed gagging.

"Thank you for that, Nero," smiled Eva.

"And good morning."

"Sorry."

"I have…" She thought for a second.

"Two things to do before we leave and we must leave for no doubt you have an end date for this quest?"

"The woman has a point," stated Finrod.

"Let her go about her business. And then let us begin our walking and riding afresh. We have a long way to go and not much time, thinking of it. So the men got ready, Eva refilled her water skin and had her letter posted, and then they all went off to the stables, ignoring the barman's pleas for them to stay. When eight o'clock came about, they were out on the road and a good way north from 'The King's Stay'.


	4. Chapter Three

**AN: The only person reading is my sister so if you like this, _please_ share it?"**

The fire light shone golden, orange and red as it flickered in the evening wind. Finrod kept it alight as Nero practised his fighting with a sword Archer had enchanted, Jehosaphat whined about women, and Hamnet nodding sadly, his slight size accentuated by the shadows. Eva just stared into the blackness of the murky woods around them.

"Jehosaphat?" she asked quietly, but so suddenly the silence that followed was pregnant with hostility and unnerving bitterness.

"What?" he growled.

"Where are we headed? What is our intent?" Another silence, until Jehosaphat spoke with anger and irritation.

"Has nobody told the Halfling our intent?" Nobody had, so Jehosaphat began to repeat what so long ago had been decided by himself and Finrod before they set out to find more adventurers.

"Far away," he began, pointing into the gloom,

"In the land of Beleriand in Middle Earth, there is a place called Doriath, and the forest of region." _(ReG-I-on)_ "To the west of it is a hill known as the Bald Hill. Amon Rudh," _(Ruth)_ "was once a lair to Turin Turambar and his outlaw band, and an abode to Mim the dwarf. It was filled with Turin's treasures and therefore has attracted a great dragon. Urulóki, meaning Fire-Serpent. We plan to slay the great lizard and claim the treasure for our own." Now, his eyes grew dark and his hands clenched into fists.

"We needed a Hobbit," he continued,

"For their stealth. They are silent and careful, and perfect thieves. But we are stuck with you. A clumsy, tottering, chittering little _female_. My, if we could have found any man however unskilled or dim-witted, I would have taken him sooner than you. You are a Took, 'tis true, but no woman no matter what family could be better an adventurer than a man. We are stuck with you while hunting dragons. I shan't say 'can it get worse?' for when I do it always does!" He finished with a sharp nod and turned away. Eva let out a low whistle, shaking her head slowly.

"Sorry," she giggled.

"I shall not ask any more questions if my lady doth not desire it!"

If I could pay to see Jehosaphat's face just then, I would. He was furious, and stormed away with such gusto the fire was put out, and it took Finrod all evening getting the stubborn thing relit. Jehosaphat did not return until long after everyone was asleep.

The next morning, the party continued through the woods they now found themselves in. The sky was almost completely hidden behind treetops, but every time a breeze blew, a glimpse of clouds and heaven peered through the leaves and tenderly blew kisses of light falling raindrops. Jehosaphat was in a particularly foul mood and trotted along ahead of the rest, glaring at the path before him and holding the reins so tightly his knuckles has paled and his horse was becoming restless. Nero, of course, was his usual jolly self and had his pony dance for Eva's amusement. However, when they stopped off for a small lunch of nuts and berries, her attentions was captured completely by Penelope, Archer's donkey. She was slightly shy, but loved Archer, and came to love Eva very fast and very much. Hamnet rode just behind his father, worried and trying very hard to make Jehosaphat proud. The truth was Jehosaphat didn't even realise Hamnet was there, so absorbed was he in his anger. This did not, however, dissuade Hamnet from his attempts, and he would not be distracted. Finrod trotted proudly in the centre of the road, his arrows slung across his back and his blade on his hip shining in the sun and all its Elvin splendour. Every now and then, he'd turn his head back with a swift flick of his long white hair, to check on the rest of the travellers, save Hamnet and Jehosaphat who we know rode ahead of even our witch-doctor. When they stopped off for another dinner, Eva got Jehosaphat by himself, determined to cut off the continuing hatred he had for her. Finrod kept the fire going and Nero, Archer and Hamnet tended to the horses etc, so Eva followed the old merchant off the path and to the marshy banks of a nearby river.

"Jehosaphat," she called, making him seethe as he was trying to get some time alone.

"Jehosaphat, I know you don't want to talk to me, but there are some things I really need to know."

"What else have they forgotten to tell you? Their names?"

"No, I just want to know why you hate me so much. I am a woman on your quest, but I can help and have not done anything aggravating, unprovoked. You disliked me immediately and I don't know why." Jehosaphat scowled at her and didn't reply. She asked the question again, and he spun round to face her with such fury written on his face, she took a startled step back.

"Will you shut up girl? It's not _you_ I hate, but the _concept_ of you, _here_, with _us_. Now leave me to my thoughts and go do whatever females do." Now, _she_ scowled, and turned on her heals in disgust.

"Your dislike, distrust of women makes me nauseous. Did you have troubles with your wife?" Jehosaphat grabbed her shoulder, spinning her round to face him. He shouted with such force, spittle sprayed on her shocked face.

"I don't _have_ a wife," he bellowed.

"Never did!" Wide-eyed, Eva stopped herself from asking about Hamnet, but Jehosaphat saw the curiosity and prepared himself to explode.

"I'm sorry," whispered Eva, overcome with sorrow at the pain in the merchant's eyes. It caught him off guard and was unexpectedly touched by her empathy. His planned rage died in his heart as he watched her and all of a sudden, he felt his past come to life behind his eyes and tears began to spill and shoulders shake as an overwhelming need to talk about it forced him to cling to Eva in devastation.

"I met her in an Elvin prison, thirty three years ago. She was a traveller, an adventurer. She was called Lightheart." Eva froze. Lightheart. She knew that name.

"We escaped together and loved for a year, birthing her two children. A boy, Hamnet, and a girl whom she named…" His eyes narrowed and he took a step away. Eva covered her mouth with her hand, realising what Jehosaphat didn't want to say.

"That's why you hate me," she whispered, close to tears herself.

"I'm your daughter!"

'_Mr & Mrs Coppertop, Bagend, Underhill, Hobbiton, The Shire._

_Jehosaphat is my father. I thought you might want to know. – Eva'_

She could imagine the looks on their faces when they read it. She hoped they wouldn't be too affected by this, but that hope, she supposed, was pointless. Of course they would be. She wanted to tell Hamnet, but Jehosaphat forbade it. He thought his son had probably guessed by now, anyway. He had heard from his father what red hair his sister had. Even so, Eva wasn't so sure. Instead, she went to Finrod.

He already knew.

Archer used a spell to send the note to Bagend, and Eva thought what a lovely person he was. He seemed to like her a lot and Eva was glad to have a good friend with her as this trying moment.

"What did he say?" asked Hamnet when she stumbled back with dampened eyes and a dazed look on her face.

"N-nothing" she lied and crept closer the fire (and Archer) to stop her shivering.

The next day, she rode next to Jehosaphat who seemed in a better mood than he had been since she'd joined them.

Hamnet, riding behind his father hopefully, was very, _very_ jealous.


	5. Chapter Four

_**AN:**_**I'm sorry if I took a while to upload, but I've been busy etc. I really hope the few who are reading this enjoy it (I'm talking about you, Ellie) and those who read this in the distant future also like it (I'm talking about you, grandchildren). Take your time. You're not obligated to like it, but I do really REALLY hope you do. Thanks!**

Days spent riding and talking, and nights spent laughing by firelight. Almost a full fortnight had passed since Mr Coppertop was left staring at an empty road where his charge had be3en only minutes before. It was a Sunday, and riding had been tough through the strong winds and heavy rain. Every few minutes it would hail, the hailstones sometimes as big as Damsons and slanting from the wind in such a way it hit the travellers from the front so they had to bow their heads to protect their eyes from the onslaught. North winds were certainly unexpected in spring, but they were there none the less and there was no way to stop them.

Eva was first to hear it. She pointed it out to the others. The wind was so loud it was hardly a vibration in the distance. A drum beat. Music. Somewhere over the next hill, there were people.

When everyone had heard it, Hamnet suggested they galloped to find out what it was before midday came about. There were no complaints, so they sped up their horses and raced towards the distant beating.

At the top of the hill, they all pulled on the reins and stood in a bundle, staring.

"A parade," gasped Hamnet, but archer disagreed.

"I know," smiled Eva.

"It's a camp!" And it was.

"Men," noted Nero.

"Like you, Jo. Big people." Jehosaphat nodded slowly, then turned his horse away.  
"We must go," he told them, to much protesting.

"Why must we, father?" cried Hamnet. Jehosaphat sighed and shook his head.

"We must go, because this isn't just a camp. Those people are royalty. We mustn't disturb them."  
"Royalty of where?" questioned Eva at once.

"Lake Town, probably. I couldn't tell." Eva gasped.

"Are they not rebuilding still, after The Battle of Five Armies? Bilbo told us they were."

"Dear Eva," spoke up Finrod.

"He told you tales of the past. Lake Town was rebuilt in only a few years, and years ago from now. And Jehosaphat, my friend. Lake Town keeps no royalty." Jehosaphat scowled, and was thinking up more possibilities, when there was a tremendous crash echoed off the hills around them and a rock as big as a troll landed beside them bringing up a fine mist to blind them momentarily.  
"Who are you, travellers, and what brings you to the camp of King Ǽlfric?" An unknown voice boomed through the grey making all six of them freeze. Eva was mildly aware of the tense atmosphere pouring from her friends when this name was spoken.  
"I am Jehosaphat," said Jehosaphat,

"And these are my companions. We stumbled upon this place unintentionally, but are honoured to find ourselves at the camp of the noble King Ǽlfric." There was no reply for a while as the dust settled, and they all held their breaths when they saw what was before them. There was no doubt others hid around them, but those they could see made up this little company;

A speaker holding the King's banner, ten archers, five swordsmen, and three knights with their swords drawn and helmets down. They were all ready for a fight. Jehosaphat drew in a sharp breath. If these people wanted them dead, they would kill all six of them without another thought. He bowed his head in respect to show he was no enemy. The others followed suit.

"You have a nice collection here," observed the speaker.

"A dwarf, an elf, a wizard, a boy and a female Halfling." Jehosaphat nodded.

"Where are you going and what is your meaning there?" No point lying.

"We seek hidden gold from the lands to the North. We mean you no harm and wish to pass without disturbing the King." The speaker inspected them for a second. He then turned to the knights.

"Take the prisoners to the jail cart. We will bring them before the good King Ǽlfric." When the knights began to stomp towards them, Jehosaphat knew there was no use resisting, so as commanded, he dismounted his horse, gave up his weapons, and followed the speaker back to the camp without struggle. The others did the same, Eva shocking the knights with how many weapons she held. When they were dragged off, they didn't pull and push at her. She was a woman, so was treated with a gentle grip on each arm and a swordsman behind her making her walk.

At the camp, they were thrown into a horse-drawn prison cell.

"What are we to do?" asked Eva, pressing her face against the bars that separated her from her friends. They all gathered to the wall to talk with her, bustling about the place to get closest. Nero succeeded and took her hand through the bars, kissing her knuckles and sniffing sadly.

"I do think we have reached the end already," he told her.

"They will surely kill us."

"I don't believe it," she replied sternly, then looked up to Finrod and Jehosaphat.

"Who is King Ǽlfric?"

"He won't harm you dear. Worry not," reassured Finrod, but Hamnet broke in with a sneer.

"He is ruthless. All he cares for is gold and women. If he lets us go, he'll make sure it is to return with the money for him, and he'll keep _you_ prisoner to make sure we _do_ return. While you are here, you would be treated as a queen might, but in reality you are a slave, tending to his every need before he even calls the order."

"I don't want to be a slave," Eva whispered.

"Or a queen. I want to be like my parents. I want to be an adventurer."

"I didn't think you knew your parents," Hamnet frowned. Now, Archer stepped in.

"She knew her mother. But Eva, _nobody_ knew who your father was. Your mother said he was a nobody." As the words passed his lips, Eva winced. Jehosaphat's head snapped round to face her and he glared.

"_Did_ she indeed?" he muttered. Then to Eva;

"What else did she say?"

"Well," sighed Eva, irritated with Jehosaphat for acting like it was her who'd done something wrong.  
"She _never_ told me I was half Big Person." Silence fell.

"No wonder I have bigger feet than the others. They called me fat, but no. I'm just a _crossbreed__**!" **_Nobody spoke. They just stared at her. Suddenly, Jehosaphat drew in a sharp breath.

"She didn't tell you anything, did she?" Eva shook her head, anger gone.

"We need to think about escape," broke in Finrod.

"Or we'll be at the mercy of King Ǽlfric forever." Just as the name brought the room back to life, so did the sunlight which suddenly shot into the room from the opening doors. Armoured soldiers tromped in and tugged them out, dragging them to a large tent made of some sort of heavy blue material where their wrists and ankles were chained together. Now, they were taken before the king.

All on their knees, they bowed their heads. Hearts beat fast and throats were dry with fear. Nobody dared steal a glance at the king who sat before them, and nobody dared breath for fear of offending him.

"Names, prison," the king ordered. Each was brought to their feet and Jehosaphat spoke.

"I am Jehosaphat, a merchant. This is my companion Finrod, a witch-doctor, my son Hamnet, the wizard is Archer but he's still learning, and the dwarf is Nero and a splendid fighter."

"And the female?" roared the king. He wanted her to answer herself. Slowly, Eva lifted her head. The man she saw was tall and so large around the middle with such thin legs; it was a miracle he could stand. A huge grey beard lay on top of his belly and long grey hair fell down his back. He had small, wrinkled features; tiny eyes so black he could hardly see, a mouth so minuet his voice surprised all, a nose so little his sense of smell was completely cut off, and no neck whatsoever. He grabbed Eva's chin in his large hand and grinned at her with yellow tombstone teeth.

"My name is Evangeline Took," she told him, trying to sound brave and somewhat succeeding.

"I am half Hobbit." She hoped it would put him off, but he only laughed, making her cough in disgust for his breath was more terrible than a hound's after its supper.

"How exotic… What's the other half?" She stayed silent, not knowing what to do. Would he prefer the truth, or should she lie? Would he know? Suddenly, his face fell and he released her chin from his grasp. Scowling, he turned to his throne, sitting down upon it before standing again and returning to Jehosaphat.

"Shy?" he asked bitterly.

"Or rude?"

"Shy, Your Majesty," Jehosaphat replied quickly. The king just glared at him.

"I hear your seeking treasure. Whose, may I ask, are you planning to take?" Jehosaphat looked unsure, knowing he shouldn't say, but the king could do awful things to liars and he wouldn't risk his friends and family.

"Urulóki, the devil's snake." Every eye turned to the ground and every breath caught. After an eternity of silence, King Ǽlfric cleared his now dry throat and spoke in a low, ruff voice; the closest to a whisper he could get.

"Why are you travelling to the halls of walking dead to take cursed gold from a winged demon?"

"Cursed?" gasped Eva without thinking. Every head turned to her.

"I didn't know," she muttered, bowing her head to avoid eye contact with anyone.

"I," burst out Jehosaphat for Eva's sake, making everyone jump.

"What?" roared King Ǽlfric, still holding his racing heart.

"I…" repeated Jehosaphat nervously.

"I like the adventure. The adrenalin of life-death situations."

"So?" spat the king.

"So… That's why I'm taking this party to the halls of walking dead." King Ǽlfric frowned and plodded over to his throne, sitting down so heavily the whole tent seemed to shake.

While he spoke, Eva stole a glance at the throne. Gold, of course, with a large rectangle of Emerald embedded vertically behind the king's head. Rubies studded the armrests and a velvet purple cousin sat beneath the huge form which now threatened to snap the seat in two. The cresting rail was carved to swirl like waves and had engraved an old script used mostly by the Big People. Eva couldn't read it at all, but they were beautiful signs. Each letter filled with the rarest jewels and gems making every word shine in the light that seeped through the fabric of the walls. She took a moment to wonder what the Big People's alphabet was like, but quickly went back to observing by moving her eyes unto the king himself who now had his index finger two knuckled deep up his tiny royal nose. When Eva started watching him, he glared her way with a snide grin before returning his attention to her father.

"You like to almost die?" he sneered. Jehosaphat just stared like a cornered rabbit.  
"I can arrange that." The king stood yet again and plodded over to Nero who bent his head down in what was supposed to be respect.

"Do you enjoy that to?" Nero shook his head.  
"To bad," chuckled King Ǽlfric, and drew a knife from his belt.

"Nero," cried Hamnet, taking a few steps closer to them. But the king dug the knife deep into the dwarf's shoulder. Nero didn't cry out or whine in pain. He grunted as if all air in his lungs had been pushed out, and when the knife was removed, he fell to his knees, blood soaking his silver dwarf-forged armour as it flooded through the gap between breast-plate and shoulder-plate onto the carpet below their feet.

"Take this dwarf to a doctor," roared the king.

"Then throw him in prison, for he has bled on my carpet!" Two soldiers marched over and dragged Nero out by the ankles.

That was the last they saw of him for what felt like a very long time.


	6. Chapter Five

**AN: _I liked this chapter when I wrote it, so I hope you guys like it too._**

There was a slight gap in the wall, Eva noticed, as she ran her fingers over the cold wood. There wasn't a single sound besides Hamnet's snoring and his – _their_ – father's light breathing. A thin sliver of moonlight crept in through the barred window by the ceiling and an icy breeze blew through her like a ghost. She shuffled quietly round the small prison cell as she tried to find something, _anything_, to save them. Suddenly, fingers curled round her leg, making her squeal.

"Shh," hissed Archer from the floor.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you. I just wanted to say that its best you get some sleep. There aren't many hours left 'til sunrise, and we'll need our strength."

"You're right," she sighed, lying down next to him and curling up close for warmth and comfort. She could hear his heart beat and felt safer. Archer would protect her. He always did.

"Hello?" They both sat bolt upright in shock.

"H-hello?" stuttered Eva in reply to the unknown voice that was coming in from the other side of the door.

"Are you okay in there?" asked the person.

"Someone screamed."

"Oh, that was me. Don't worry; I just had a fright is all." There came a sigh of relief, then;

"Who are you? What did you do?"

"We're travellers," Archer put in.

"We did nothing."

"Who are you? Where's the girl?" gasped the voice, sounding more worried than it really had reason to.

"I'm here," Eva reassured him.

"This is Archer. I'm Evangeline."

"Pleasure to meat you both. I'm Giggles. How many of you are there?"

"Six, including us. But the sixth is missing. The king stabled him, and he's being doctored."

"We hope," added Archer in a bitter, angry voice. Finrod opened one eye.

"Who are you talking to, children?"

"Finrod this is Giggles. Giggle; Finrod."

"Hello," called Giggles, a kindness and joyfulness always occupying his voice. Finrod sat up.

"The pleasure's all mine, sir." Silence for a couple of seconds, then Eva spoke.

"What do you do here Giggles?"

"I'm a soldier," he told her with a hint of sadness, maybe regret in his jolly tone.

"I don't like to hurt people, but all I do really, is guard things." More silence. Then Giggles coughed nervously.

"Evangeline, do you know how much danger you are in by being here? If anything happens to you, Arthur and Finrod will be blamed."

"It's _Archer_," corrected the latter, continuing to say;

"And Nero, Hamnet and Jehosaphat will be blamed also. Will you not get in trouble for talking to us, Giggles?"

"No one needs to know," he chuckled, then opened a hatch in the door so he could see them. Eva observed his face to be round and olive with a dark flush to his cheeks implying prolific laughter and maybe a drop of wine none too often. Wanting to talk to him face-to-face, she stepped forwards.

"Oh my," he whispered upon seeing her emerge from the shadows. Her frizzy hair was even crazier due to all the much wanted adventure she'd been having recently, and her eyes shone with undying hope. He stared for a couple of seconds before placing his large hands both sides of the barred hatch and stepping closer.

"You shouldn't be in there," he told her, brown eyes sparkling and smile fading from his face at once. He slid a dark hand through the iron bars and touched her face, winning a thin smile.

"You shouldn't be in here," he said again. Eva nodded.

"I know, but we can't get out." Giggles thought for a minute before pulling his hand out and beginning to unlock the door.

"No," cried Eva.

"Not without Nero!" Giggles sighed, closing the door again and gazing mournfully through the door hatch.

"What's going on?" slurred Hamnet, half waking up.

"This is Giggles," Archer explained.

"And Giggles, this is Hamnet."

"Hello," said Giggles, then;

"Where are they keeping this Nero fellow?"

"What's it to you, Snigger?" demanded Hamnet immediately, but Finrod interrupted with a repetition of what had earlier passed between them and King Ǽlfric.

"The Royal Healer's tent is not that far from here," Giggles muttered, but Eva shook her head.

"He's injured. He really couldn't go far or fast."

"But it may be too late tomorrow. We cannot wait for him to heal, for it could take forever!" Eva placed a finger to the bars as if to silence him, then closed her eyes in an attempt to calm herself.

"They will not kill me, or my friends, 'til the treasure is received by them."

"Did she say '_friends_'?" hissed Hamnet, and Archer shot him a cold glare.

"They need Nero as a bribe, so he too, will survive as long as we cooperate. Wait until he's healed. We shall stall for time, _then_ we will go. And would not _you_ be punished?"

"Almost certainly, Evangeline. But… But as I said before: you don't belong in this place. Not any of you. Not at all." Then his smile returned and he spoke of happier things, laughing like nothing in the world was wrong. Finally, long after Jehosaphat joined the conversation, the sun began to rise.

"I must be off," grinned Giggles, before pushing his hand through the bars to take Eva's.

"Farewell Evangeline. And Hamnet, Archer, Finrod and Jehosaphat. I wish Nero well, and I will check on him today. I will find you tonight and we can talk again." And he removed his hand and slowly closed the hatch, blocking out most of the light.

"Bye, Snigger," smirked Hamnet.

"Our idiot ticket out."

But not ten minutes had passed before the whole door was pushed wide open by five armoured men who ruthlessly dragged them from the prison cart.

They were going to see the king.

"Your friend is healed," King Ǽlfric called to them as soon as they were dragged into his tent. But when they spied Nero, in chains at the back, they could tell he was not healed in the way he should have been. The shoulder that had been wounded was now just a stub, as the whole arm had been cut off. His own blood was smeared and splashed across his face and arms and he looked terrible. He would have been very aware of this fact himself, however at that precise moment, he knew nothing. He was in a deep and painful slumber caused by either a drug or a blow to the head. If they had been unable to see his chest move up and down with his breathing, they would have supposed him dead.  
"So," began King Ǽlfric, restoring himself as centre of attention.

"What do you need for this quest of yours? You will bring me the treasure, I know, but only if you survive. Let us make sure that you will." Eva seethed quietly. Poor Nero. She only wished it had been her instead. Finrod put a hand on her arm to comfort her and she smiled grimly at him in way of thanks.

"Evangeline Took," the king said suddenly, trotting over to them and taking her hand.

"I'm hoping _you_ will stay behind. An adventure with _that dragon_ will be too much for a woman. You will stay here and keep me company, won't you." Eva clenched her teeth and said nothing. The king narrowed his eyes. Apparently, it was possible to make them even smaller.

"Miss Took, I am being kind. Reply. I am the king." '_A__ king'_ thought Eva, but just stared up at him.

"Well?" he spat.

"King Ǽlfric, if you wish to be kind then please let me go with them. I have dreamed of dragons and adventures all my life." He didn't seem too happy with this response, but let it slide. Mostly because Nero woke up.

"W-what?" he gasped, looking up and around with confused and pain-filled eyes.

"The dwarf awakens. Throw them back in the cage."

Giggles returned that night, and met Nero, who was in much pain and therefore couldn't escape. The next morning, king Ǽlfric continued trying to seduce Eva for the fun of it, knowing if he failed he had blackmail and force on his side. Then, in the evening, Giggles was back again. Eva stood against the inside of the door, and he stood against the outside. They whispered and laughed together, but still, they couldn't leave.

Days passed the same. Two more, though they felt like years. Every night, Giggles came back and every night, Eva liked him more and more. Archer seemed all the time to be desperate for her attentions, and this confused her, but nobody spoke about any of it. Then finally, on the third night since Nero was returned to them, they could go. Giggles opened the prison door for them and locked it again once they were all out. Everything was silent as they padded along the path to the entrance.

Guards. This was terrible. A guard on each side of the arch leading into the rest of the valley. They ducked behind a parked cart and watched.

"Ho Lucky, Thunder," stage-whispered Giggles, trotting over to them and leading them to one side to chat. One by one, the prisoners crept past and out behind the wall. But Nero caught his shoulder wound on a wood chip on the arch that caused him to howl in pain.

"Stop," shouted the guards, Lucky and Thunder.

"Giggles, how could you?" one hissed as the escaping travellers broke into a sprint, archers firing and swordsmen chasing. Giggles ran after them but the guards shouted 'traitor', and he was a target as well. Another scream of pain from Nero made Eva look back. The dwarf had fallen to the floor and was clawing blindly at an arrow protruding from his thigh.

"Nero," shouted Giggles, running to him and pulling him up, trying to carry him along. But they were slow.

Too slow.

Another arrow hit Nero and it took Giggles down with him.

"Run," he bellowed at the five remaining escapees as Nero, still wailing, was dragged back by swordsmen. Then a group of others surrounded Giggles. This was followed by a long and tortured cry.

Even when it had stopped, the sound rung in Eva's ears. She looked over her shoulder to see king Ǽlfric himself standing next to a thrashing and shouting Nero. He was grinning like a lunatic which, for clarification, he was. He knew they'd _have_ to return now. Eva's eyes strayed farther across the field as they ran up and in to the towering forest that surrounded the valley. A dark, still figure lay in the ankle-high grass. He wore armour that brandished the crest of King Ǽlfric.

"Giggles," she whispered, her voice braking. Then she turned back and ran as fast as she could away from the king's men.


End file.
